Marking

I should be working on some school work now that the kids are in bed and I have a final on Friday and two research papers due next week, but I've become less inclined to submit to the "shoulds" imposed upon me by the outside world. I wanted to mark this day instead by writing something here in this space. Today was a beautifully FULL day. I am sitting here now feeling overwhelmed with the fullness and goodness in my life. And I don't really know how I got to this sacred place.

In the past I was always on an accelerated course in life. Married at 19 and three kids by the time I was 25. I was always eager to get to the next stage...the next big step. I was always running. When I arrived at this chapter in my journey nearly three years ago, my pace began to drastically decrease. I entered into a different culture and was invited to slow down so that I might recover the "me" that was lost in the race. My first year of school, being away from everything that had been familiar, realizing that life as I had known it was no longer reality - at times felt like death. The crazy thing, though, was that in facing death I actually felt more alive than I had before. I was no longer living like a vapor, like a ghost always running and doing... and never being...never understanding what I was feeling and why I was feeling it.

I remember thinking and telling others that I met myself when I came to this place. But today something even more remarkable occurred to me - not only have I met my "self" but somehow in the past few months I've begun to love her too. How has this come to be? I'm really not sure. There is some mystery to it all. But there are some contributors to this shift that I can identify. I have come to know and be known by remarkable people. Today I sat amidst a group of people all encircling around me, hearing me, holding me, seeing me, affirming that who I am is worthy of protection. They will likely never know the impact of their presence in those moments today. They can't possibly understand how powerful that experience was for me. You see I learned to run early in life because there was no one there to protect me if I ever stopped running. No one protected that little girl from all of the evil all around her. And today she was fought for...and she could finally stand still.

Today was a day worth marking. It was a day worthy of standing still long enough to let it all in...to feel...to be.

Rosemary R. Ruether on the "good news" for women...

"Radical Christians through the centuries have interpreted this 'good news' for women as one that liberates women from subjugation to the male into a new autonomous personhood through renunciation of sex and childbearing, but mainline Catholic and Protestant Christianity strove to correct this radical view. Instead women were told they were saved by Christ only by redoubling their subjugation to the male as their 'head', whether that meant their husbands as wives or their male ecclesiastic superiors as celibate 'sisters'. Thus redemption for women has been filtered through a deeply misogynist lens that identified femaleness with the sources of evil, that is, sex, sin and death, and the mortality of the body and the earth."

I'm gonna miss this stuff...

I'm currently entrenched in a 3-day course called The Theology of Eroticism. Expect future posts regarding the thoughts being stirred on this particular subject (perhaps after I finish all of the papers I have due in the coming weeks). But until then, I've posted this video showcasing the two professors that are teaching this class. They are classic characters and have been best friends since the 7th grade. And so without further adieu, I present Dr. Tremper Longman III and Dr. Dan Allender.

Happy St. Patty's Day!

And I think it's only fitting to start counting down the days until Bri and I head off for the land of Ire. Yup...122 days until we set sail (or board a plane) headed straight for Dublin. We're trying to squeeze in some much needed planning time since we'd also like to tour the Western Coast where some of the most beautiful landscapes are said to be resting. It will hopefully be such sweet celebration for us as we experience some much needed time together to reflect upon all that we've survived as well as dream of what will come to be in our life together as we move forward from this journey. And all of this goodness will most certainly be complimented with the free-flowing fermented flavors available in the multitude of authentic Irish pubs. Today is simply a tease of what is to come!

church

Memory, dream, desire -
they’re all the same to me.
Vision of what is to come,
or fantasy of what will never be.

A feast, a frenzy, a festival
of all shapes, colors and sizes.
Union of difference,
not merger or sameness.

His and Her voices all harmonizing
not raping, oppressing or demonizing.
A chorus of voices,
not dominating solos.

A mutual meeting of needs
where one is not set over, above, apart.
Freely giving out of abundance
not obligatory guilt.

A baptism of ethnicity and commitment
fostered by the call of the Spirit
who comes to all, is for all, is with all.
The humble sign of our commonality.

A shared burden, load, task
to be the face of God to the world.
A family void of sibling rivalry,
each has a place of honor in the field.

Conflict is a necessity for growth.
It reveals as it is processed.
The chaos of difference
and the beauty of struggle.

Memory, dream, desire -
they’re all the same to me.
Vision of what is to come
or fantasy of what will never be.